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Friday, 09 January 2009
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diet pills
Does anyone know if they actually work? I started taking Akavar yesterday. I noticed that I had absolutely no appetite. Maybe it was because I had binged/purged earlier. Or maybe it was the pills. I also noticed they gave me a ton of energy...so much I couldn't really sleep. So I just took two this morning and hopefully I can sleep tonight. I really hope they help me lose weight! I noticed that my stomach was flatter this morning. I also hope they stop me from binging... that would be great! I hope all you girls are doing well. Take care,
breakfast: diet cocoa 25 cals, water
lunch: n/a
dinner: n/a
Thursday, 08 January 2009
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Dreaming...
Okay so today was f****d up. Binge,binge, binge...I'm eating as I type this...almonds...and milk.I feel so fat and ashamed...I need to get back on track but I don't want to look suspicious to my parents or boyfriend...I really need some tips here. How do you only eat soup without it looking like your only eating soup? tomorrow seems like a good no cal day...tea only...I promised myself I'd stop eating at midnight and purge so I can have a fresh start to the new day...I need to get this disgusting food out of my system...how can I slip up so badly when I have been doing so good? steadily losing weight for the last 4 or 5 weeks? It's really beyond words how I feel right now. I want to be thin and beautiful more than anything. I want to be a model. I was thinking about trying out for americas next top model if I get thin enough in time...by march...arrrrghhh. Not at this rate. I know you girls have got some good...possibly great tips...please share them....thanks...much
alex
Wednesday, 07 January 2009
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HELP! Please...anybody...
I have a serious binge problem...I just did it again this morning...even though my morning started off pretty good...I did yoga and had egg whites and salsa (my favorite low cal dish). Then as soon as everyone left the house I ate (but not limited to) : yogurt, almonds, cookies, hot chocolate, cereal, and a small piece of cake. OMG. How can I let myself do this? I feel like such a cheater...Well you know what happens next...I purge....as much as I can. After purging I did pilates for 37 minutes and took fiber laxatives...I'm not eating for the rest of the day...I feel disgusting...I wish I could stop...somebody please help me!
Intake: 1000's of cals probably
Outtake: Purging plus
*yoga 50 minutes 213
* pilates 37 minutes 205 calories
NO MORE FOOD TODAY...I'm so sick of food... -
So...
yesterday was a good day. I think I ate less than 200 cals. didn't get a chance to exercise though...bummer. oh well, I still feel reasonably good regardless of exercise. I think I should try to eat a little more...my metabolism is probably slowing down...I checked my weight tonight... I've only dropped a pound since last thursday? that kind of sucks...I'll check my weight again in the morning...maybe its really less, I'm just retaining water or something ( I think that must be it, I am PMS after all). Argh, I hate getting my period. It makes me feel so fat. I wish I didn't have to have one...then I would never feel all gross and bloated (unless I ate too much). I think I know why I've only lost a pound...it must be the binging/purging I did two days in row... I really need to cut that out...how else am I going to get down to 120 in a month??? Any tips girlies?
Take care, think thin,
Natalia Vodianova is my favorite model * sigh* I want to look that good!
Alex...and here is some *random* thinspo!
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